In this and subsequent Scenarios you have an opportunity to practice thinking before interacting by choosing the best action and then comparing your choice with the preferred one based on positive goal-focused principles.
Before making your selection remember that the best interaction is positive, goal-directed and in "sync" with the needs and wants of children. Pay particular attention to:
The Golden Rule--Caring and Respect
Learning by Doing and Imitating
Learning To Think for Themselves
Learning to make Good Decisions
Learning to Follow Rules and Take Responsibility for Poor Choices
Johnny, age 9, tells you he forgot to bring home his spelling list.
Before making your selection remember that the best interaction is positive, goal-directed and in "sync" with the needs and wants of children. Pay particular attention to:
The Golden Rule--Caring and Respect
Learning by Doing and Imitating
Learning To Think for Themselves
Learning to make Good Decisions
Learning to Follow Rules and Take Responsibility for Poor Choices
Johnny, age 9, tells you he forgot to bring home his spelling list.
What is your best action?
1. Say, “Why don’t you call Amy to see if she can fax the list to you?”
2. Say, “I’ll write your teacher a note asking her to excuse you this time.”
3. Say, “Sounds like you have a problem; any ideas on how to solve it?”
4. Say, “This is the second time this week; one more time and you’re grounded for a week!”
Please consider each choice carefully before selecting the best one. The Goal-Focused Positive Parenting choice with brief comments are as follows:
Dad’s best action is Option 3. Here you are encouraging Johnny to think for himself and be responsible. If he comes up with a good solution (like calling Amy) that’s great. If not, then he’ll just have to suffer the consequences as determined by his teacher.
Worst action is Option 2. Here you are overprotecting. Johnny must learn to be responsible for his actions, to handle it himself and to accept adverse consequences if necessary.
Option 1. This could be a good solution that might help give him some insight into problem-solving, but your thinking for him is not a good way to encourage him to think for himself and it does not promote independence and self-reliance.
Option 4. This is not a good option since at this time the adverse consequences should come from the teacher. If forgetting the spelling list (and possibly other school issues) becomes more frequent, it would be best for you to meet with Johnny’s teacher to see if there is an underlying problem, and then together with the teacher see how you may be able to help.
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